Why Divorce rates have jumped in small cities?
Usually when a marriage happens, it’s a life time gig. But, our culture demands it to be for ‘saat janam’ (seven lives) altogether. According to statistics, India was known for higher global rates in successful marriages, almost 100%! India had 1 out of 100 divorce cases as opposed to America’s 50% divorce rate. This was the Indian marital state 10-20 years ago. Over the years there has been an increase in the divorce rates in India. It revolutionized from being Sharma Aunty’s hot gossip, to countless news debates, to being a topic in feature films. In fact even the movies have altered plots in portraying separations. In the movie Dil Dhadakne Do (2015) with the setting of elite families of Delhi, Ayesha Mehra (Priyanka Chopra) wants a divorce from her husband Manav (Rahul Bose) on the perimeters of incompetency, lack of mutual feelings, and a hint of patriarchy. Whereas in the movie Toilet- Ek Prem Katha (2017), executes a love story in a small village in UP where divorce papers were to be signed between Jaya (Bhumi Pednekar) and Keshav (Akshay Kumar) on the issue of sanitization, change of lifestyle, and society.
The landmark Hindu Code Bill passed in the parliament in the mid-1950s gave women property rights, outlawed polygamy and allowed partners to file for divorce. The laws were further tweaked in 1976 to allow divorce by mutual consent. The general purpose behind these laws was to abrogate social disparities and inequalities. More importantly, to elevate the social status of women in India.
The growing strength of women's empowerment and identity in small towns and rural areas resulted in awareness of marital rights. In 2016, an abusive relationship was terminated where the wife’s decision to part ways was a slap on the face for her husband (quite literally). Women are aware about seeking help in cases of, adultery, desertion, cruelty, impotency and other legal grounds on which divorces and separations are granted. They are more willing to take the chance of building a new life for themselves. In other words, states where there is progress in women’s rights, there are higher rates of divorces and separation, like the North-eastern states. North-eastern states, while showing tremendous disparity among each other, are different from other states, given the matrilineal systems, tribal customs and women having more control over assets and incomes as compared to women in other states. Contradicting that, states with stagnant or low development of women rights also have high rates of divorce. This is observed in the Northern states that have low-sex ratios like UP, Bihar, and Jharkhand. There are many reasons and factors that result in separation between a married couples of small cities. Generally speaking:
Financial independence of women.
Marriage against the wishes of the man or woman.
Conflicts between choices of lifestyle.
Adultery
With growth in education, media footprints, higher expectations from lifestyle, and concept of individualism has made separations and divorces a common occurrence in small towns and rural areas. There are so many cases of divorce or separation today that the Government of India has created Crime against Women Cells and Matrimonial Courts in many non-metro cities too. Women from small towns and fast developing rural areas are starting to be financially independent enabling them to end a bad marriage and live their lives on their own terms.
Growth in divorce rates in India is a reflection of changing in the socio-economic landscape of the society. This resulted in independency of women creating a shift in patriarchy. Figures show that young couples from middle class and lower class are opting out unhappy marriages. Marriage is no more an institution or it’s the final, long- term relationship. India has always had a legal option to walk out of a marriage, what restricted women was the patriarchy of governance, society, families, and even finance. Divorces were signed mostly for the reasons of cheating and impotency, they are no longer the only reason for divorce, and currently incompetency and adultery are the most cited reasons. Along with that influence of family, the growth of women psychological and financial independence, late marriages, have resulted in reluctance to compromise on lifestyle.
India has seen modernization, psychological development, and personal efficiency over the years. This has converted a women’s outlook to the world and vice versa by withstanding the patriarchy. But, how far can one defy the culture of marriage and relationship? And is women’s rights always the right answer? Will culture, patriarchy, and even women’s safety and empowerment, became some sort of an excuse?
